Transcending the Ego
What defines us as an “I”? What makes us feel individual and separate? What do we each have that makes us feel unique? Some of the things that define us as individuals are our physical body, the content of our mind - especially our memory, our feelings, beliefs and opinions.
What is universal? What is not particular to us as individuals? What is shared and available to all? The happiness I so often mention is universal, it’s available to everyone. It’s not my happiness because I have something I want or am feeling something that I like. Love is also universal; the very meaning of the word love, as I use it, is about the feeling of unity. Both love and happiness, that are often themes of these sheets, are universal feelings.
Our memory defines us individually, our beliefs and opinions define us individually, our presumed destiny defines us individually. All these we could say are our ego, our sense of a separate self. They can, if allowed, not only give us a feeling of being separate, but also actively separate us from others.
What is universal is hidden in a shroud of individuality. Through meditation we can uncover what is universal and from that perspective transcend our ego. To us as individuals the ego is most important and effectively defines us. Unfortunately, it also limits us and imprisons us in a shell of individuality. But this shell is insubstantial, it’s not really real, it’s only imagined. We never are, in fact, separate, we only believe ourselves to be so. Therefore, all that needs to be realised is exactly that - our separateness is imagined, insubstantial, merely believed and therefore not real. Our individuality is an insubstantial illusion we unwittingly and naively impose upon the one great reality which is happiness, which is love.
If we observe ourselves from the relaxed, open perspective of love and happiness we can see our strategies of ego preservation. From that perspective we then have a choice - to stay with the feelings of love and happiness or indulge ourselves in egoic behaviour. In other words, do we indulge in reactive emotions and behaviour or do we respond from a happy and loving heart? The “art of happiness” involves developing the capacity to transcend our ego in favour of the feelings of pleasurable oneness. Put another way - sacrificing and going beyond the lesser, reactive and egoic feelings and communing with the greater, responsive feelings of love and happiness. The choice can be ours and through meditation and self understanding we can give ourselves that option of a more informed and intelligent choice.
Realising the reality of love and happiness is a matter of transcending egoic patterns of thought and behaviour. As we grow from childhood our ego develops, becoming more defined and complete. If we want to continue to grow as adults then that ego can be transcended and we can realise more universal qualities beyond the limits of our ego. If the ego has not developed and become strong in childhood and adolescence then that growth may need to complete itself in adulthood before the ego can be gone beyond. This doesn’t imply we have to become perfect, just that we have to be reasonably responsible for ourselves physically, emotionally and mentally and be able to exist as an independent and self-regulating individual. From that position we can transcend ourselves and continue to grow beyond ourselves. So the process of meditation and self realisation is not one of perfecting the ego, it’s one of going beyond the ego and becoming perfect love, perfect happiness.